Transcending the imposter syndrome
Have you ever felt like you took on a job you were completely underqualified for? Thinking that all your achievements happen because of dumb luck? Finding success yet feeling upset instead of happy?
Well, you are ‘in luck’, you must be experiencing a psychological phenomenon named Imposter Syndrome.
What is Imposter Syndrome?
Imposter Syndrome is the experience of an individual who is led to believe that he/she is a phony. Any achievement or success earned feels like it must be attributed to something random rather than one’s competence or efforts.
Self-doubt builds up like a tall brick wall imprisoning you and Fear holds you back from climbing over it by making you believe that if you do try, the wall will collapse onto you.
Deep down, I have suffered from this belief many times, which led me to seek advice from others.
Most often than not, I was fed the same plain advice repeatedly: “fake it till you make it”.
What is “Fake It Till You Make It”?
People have preached this cliché, advocating the way to success is through the acquisition of an armor of pretence or false confidence, “winging it” and doing whatever it takes to reach the point of success.
Ironically, I believe this dogma is what actualizes the Imposter Syndrome.
Dunning-Kruger Effect
The Dunning-Kruger effect is named after two social psychologists who have derived the theory that people have different levels of confidence depending on their level of competence:
- Mt Stupid: High in confidence, Low in competence
- Valley of Despair: Low in confidence, Moderate in competence
- Slope of Enlightenment: High in confidence, High in competence
Based on their research, I believe that Imposter Syndrome kicks in the Valley of Despair to Slope of Enlightenment.
Personally, I take Imposter Syndrome as a positive sign that signifies the beginning of one’s growing ability and skill level. If one does not suffer from it, they must be suffering from a narcissistic personality disorder or doomed to spend eternity on Mt.Stupid instead.
Tips To Overcome Imposter Syndrome
Based on my experience, let me share with you how I successfully made my voyage through the ‘mountains’ and ‘valleys’ of the Dunning-Kruger effect:
1) Stop Sabotaging Yourself
“It isn’t the mountains ahead to climb that wear you out, it’s the pebble in your shoe.”
— Muhammad Ali
Self-sabotage is a behaviour where people actually make poor and damaging decisions that prevent themselves from reaching their goals:
- Blaming others when things go wrong
- Choosing to walk away when challenges arise
- Procrastination
Are you guilty of this?
Be Kind To Yourself
The way to move forward is to recognize the toxicity in your behaviour and improve on your actions:
- Say encouraging things to yourself instead of putting yourself down
- Accept credit when given. Do not push it away
- Resist the temptation to take shortcuts, escape or give up
Even though we might not be able to control our feelings, we can control how we deal with our emotions. Give yourself a pat on the back rather than a stab in the back. Self-sabotage is like choosing to walk with pebbles in your shoes. It is a regressive behaviour that will not take anyone further than Mt. Stupid.
2) The Power of Vulnerability
“It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.”
— Sir Edmund Hillary
Be Vulnerable
To err is human: it is natural for human beings to make mistakes, yet society paints vulnerability as a sign of weakness when in fact it is the greatest strength one can possess emotionally.
Find emotional liberation by doing this:
- Reflect daily
- Admit & own your mistakes
- Forgive yourself
- Make amendments
- Ask for help
- Articulate your feelings (tell someone how you feel or write it down)
To get out of the Valley Of Despair, we must first conquer ourselves.
3) Music Magic
“Music can heal the wounds, medicine cannot touch.”
— Debasish Mridha
Let It Go
Frozen is one of my favorite animations and the “Let It Go” soundtrack from the movie is an anthem everyone must hear. The lesson behind this song is one of empowerment: it teaches us to break free from the shackles of fear imposed by the Imposter Syndrome. It gives us the strength needed to truly be ourselves.
Music Is Energy
Even as an adult, I find listening to “Let It Go” absolutely motivating. However if this soundtrack does not work for you, go find a song that gives you that same empowering and uplifting feeling as music has shown to give loads of emotional benefits.
Create a Spotify playlist and give it a strong title: ‘Good Mood Songs’ (something positive). When that Imposter Syndrome comes creeping, turn up the music and blast those bad vibes away.
Here is a list of my favorite music genres, albums & playlists that always put me in the right mood:
- Melodic dubstep — Worlds Apart EP by Seven Lions
- Progressive house & trance — Flow State (Continuous Mix) by Above & Beyond
- Equal part nostalgic synthwave sounds — Retrowave / Outrun Playlist
Just like how food feeds hunger, music is chicken soup for the soul.
4) Give / Serve
“To move forward, you have to give back.” — Oprah Winfrey
In my years working as a master fitness trainer & a designer, I have never found anything more reassuring and rewarding as giving back to my community.
Mentoring
If you mentor and teach others, you are subjected to a challenge of your domain skills & knowledge, communication capacity and educational ability.
Most significantly, when you witness the success of your mentees, it will elevate your confidence and validate your competence simultaneously.
Even if you are just starting out as a junior, find opportunities to impart your knowledge and use your specific skills. There will definitely be ways to you can contribute, even in the slightest manner. Someone can always learn something from you. Give, serve and guide. When you look back on those moments, you will find yourself already taken baby steps forward.
This is the way up the Slope Of Enlightenment.
Conclusion
Now, on my bad days, when I am feeling down and lousy, I pause and think.
I pick up my headphones and listen to my favorite songs.
I remind myself of my mentees and the contributions that I have made.
Every single time, without failure, this transcends my Imposter Syndrome.